Hello, my friends.

This morning, around 0800, Oscar was obviously in pain, and he let me know it.

This happens occasionally. About a year ago, I took him in to the dog doc, and after some x-rays a small bulge was located on his spine.

This isn’t unusual for his breed.

The doc gave him some pain pills, and told me he was goin’ to be okay, but that it could be a bigger problem down the road.

Around every 4-8 weeks it flares up for a few hours, but he gets over it after Patti gives him a back massage.

It doesn’t work if I do it. No surprise there…Patti has healing hands.

In fact, we didn’t hafta take him to the doc since then.

Until today.

He just kept gettin’ worse and worse, until he got to the point where he wouldn’t eat or drink.

Sometimes, it’s his glands in his rear fill up withfluid and that also causes a lot of discomfort and pain. So I took him to the dog grooming place in town to check that out. They only charge a few bucks for the procedure, and I wanted to rule that out before takin’ him to the doc.

Well, that wasn’t the problem, so I called the doggy doc, and she was able to squeeze us in at 1720, which I was thankful for, ’cause they close at 1800.

They have 2 vet’s there and they are both very good. And fortunately, they take post-dated checks, ’cause we only have about 50 bucks in the bank.

The doc examined Oscar, asking all the basic questions, and decided to do an x-ray.

After the x-ray she showed me the three images, and it was clear that Oscar has something blocking his lower stomach/upper intestine area.

And, as a result, there was a gas build-up, and that was causing the pain.

The doc wanted to do a barium procedure, to get a better idea what the object was.

It could’ve been a bone, tumor, cyst, or some other substance, but without the barium it just looked like a big ball.

Oscar doesn’t eat anything that isn’t food, and I keep a close eye on him outside, but it is possible he managed to smuggle a bone into the house, or maybe wolfed it down without me noticing, but it’s not likely.

And we never give him bones, not even those chewy ones, because they can cause all sorts of problems for dogs.

Especially, Oscar, ’cause he eats fast sometimes.

Case in point, 2 years ago, not long after we were given Oscar by his prior owner, we used to give him and Cammilu those pig ear treats.

Oscar swallowed a piece that was too big (although we didn’t know it at the time) and we had to take him to the doggy doc.

It caused a lot of pain, ’cause it temporarily blocked his lower stomach and resulted in a gas build-up.

But that was temporary, and the doc gave him some pain pills until it finally broke down, and he was fine.

Anyway, back to the present, there was a problem. The veterinary hospital closes at 1800 and they didn’t have time to do the barium thing.

The doc recommended I take him to Olympia, but there was another problem. The Olympia hospital doesn’t take post-dated checks. Of course they don’t.

What now? The doc gave me some anti-gas pills and pain pills to give Oscar, but she told me that Oscar could die tonight. If he does make it until mornin’, I’ll take him in as soon as they open, and we’ll go from there.

That’s the only option.

Patti is takin’ care of the little guy, for the most part. Oscar always wants to be with her when he’s hurtin’, and it’s no wonder.

Poor guy has been pretty vocal all night, with little relief. Those pain pills don’t seem to be workin’ too well, but I know intestinal pain like that can’t be curved much by pain pills.

You know, I have realized that this is another consequence of my own stupidity, as my post: Incompootence reveals. Sure, some of that would’ve gone for bills we’re puttin’ off, but I’m pretty sure we would’ve had enough to take him to Olympia.

I know…ain’t no use thinkin’ about coulda, woulda, shoulda’s.

But I can’t help it right now. Even though I know how.

I dunno…that’s not rational, is it? I’m hard on myself when I make a mistake that hurts others.

I’m even harder on myself when my sins have devastated my wife and kids (and still are).

But I have never made a mistake that resulted in death…yet.

My sins may very well result in my death, but the pain I have caused my family is worse than that, the way I see it.

If Oscar dies…because of my stupidity…

I mean, he’s a dog, right? So how come I feel so bad?

No…Oscar is much more than a dog. He’s…my friend.